It is necessary that I acknowledge the unsettling events (#EndSars protests) that took place across our country these past 2 weeks, and most especially those that lost their lives on Tuesday, 20-10-20. We’ll never forget! My heart goes out to the bereaved families and I pray Abba to heal their wounded hearts in Jesus name amen.

One thing I know for sure is that the youths are now awake to our rights and the power we possess when we pose a united front. The Igbo saying, “Igwebuike”, isn’t any truer. It can only get better from here.

Now, dear Chioma, I want you to understand that you were born for such a time as this, greatness lies inside of you and sincerely this is the time to awaken the giant inside of you. Because the set time for your exploits and manifestation is now!

When you told me about that brother “who shared the vision of you which he received from the lord after spending weeks on the mountains of Gibeah” (pun intended). I was glad because it would be abnormal for brothers not to notice a fair and beautiful sister like you who has the curves in all the right places. But I was not too enthusiastic about it because I’ve seen sisters go into relationships and marriages, and that was the end of them and the gifts that God put in them for conquering Cosmos.

Is this to say they didn’t marry Gods will for them? No. the reason is that they “possibly” married God’s will but not at God’s time. The Bible expressly says in Ecclesiastes 3 that for everything there’s a time and a season.

So, my dear Chioma, this is not the time for saying yes, this is the time for self/purpose discovery, personal development and spiritual development. I know your entire body is eager for marriage, you better be calming down o. If you take off like a tornado, you’ll definitely crash. If you rush into this thing called marriage and you suddenly discover that it wasn’t meant to be, remember you don’t have an option of rushing out via divorce. You would have to endure it for life, meanwhile, marriage wasn’t created by Abba to be endured but to be enjoyed.

A dear friend once asked me to help her pray about a relationship she was about going into and as I prayed, to my utter surprise the Lord asked me to tell her to go for NYSC first before anything relationship and I wondered why. Abba said there are gifts inside of her that were yet to be discovered, and only exposure and time would help her discover them.

Funny enough, sometimes later I was talking to another very dear friend who is now through with NYSC and as we talked, I jokingly asked her when her wedding invitation would come out and she was like soon. As we talked further, she told me she was very grateful to God for NYSC because it has opened her eyes to a lot of myopic mindsets she once harboured while on campus. She said that under one year of NYSC she had discovered her purpose and direction for life. She even had to break out of a relationship that she had now discovered was never meant to be, but was, because she was naïve. Today she’s doing exploits.

It’s not like I’m saying you must go for NYSC first before saying yes to a brother, but then I believe there’s a divine reason these events occurred before your information got to me. See, whether you like it, your immediate environment is a limitation, one way or the other, and only geographic exposure can help widen your horizon and enlighten your mindset. Live doesn’t end on your campus and the brothers in your fellowship and the ones you already know are not the only brothers on fire for God, I tell you.

You were not created just to get married to a brother and help him accomplish his God-given purpose. What about your own purpose, or do you believe God didn’t give you one? So when you are in your final year your only prayer point is, “God please send him o, let him locate me.” or when you graduate you do nothing else for the kingdom and your world, you fold your arms and wait for “God’s will?” please you’re too intelligent for such garbage.

I believe Gen 2:18 100%. But I want you also to know that you have a purpose on earth. You are not a child breeding machine, neither were you only created for the kitchen and zaa oza room. God made you for greatness, it’s in you. Discover your purpose for life and “God’s will” will locate you in your purpose.

How do I know this, let’s look at some women in scriptures who were in their purpose when their “God’s will” discovered them:

1. Ruth:

She was found by Boaz in his field where she was accomplishing her purpose of serving her mother-in-law, Naomi. Had she not gone out into the field(purpose) she probably wouldn’t have been discovered by Boaz(God’s will). I implore you to pause, read Ruth 2 you’d be wowed. Take your time.

2. Rebekah:

Genesis 24:15-17

15 Before he had finished praying, he saw a young woman named Rebekah coming out with her water jug on her shoulder. She was the daughter of Bethuel, who was the son of Abraham's brother Nahor and his wife, Milcah. 16 Rebekah was very beautiful and old enough to be married, but she was still a virgin. She went down to the spring, filled her jug, and came up again. 17 Running over to her, the servant said, "Please give me a little drink of water from your jug."

Imagine for a second that Rebekah didn’t go out to fetch water that day, imagine she was seated at home waiting for God’s will to come and meet her, remember vs16 said she was old enough to be married. Yet she didn’t stop going out to work, accomplishing her purpose until God’s will found her. 

Again I want you to notice she was diligent in pursuit of her purpose because if you look at vs11 you’ll see that the bible said it was evening when women came out to draw water yet she was the first Eleazer saw. It’s obvious she wasn’t a lazy latecomer, and that was why before Eleazer could finish praying he saw her coming out with her water jug on her shoulder, possibly chanting one ancient hymn like that.

So my dear Chioma, before you say yes to him, have you discovered purpose? What’s your goal in life? How big are you on personal development? Seriously, you need to answer these questions. Plus, if you ask me, I would advise you to go for NYSC first, gain exposure, read books and then we can talk about his proposal.

Remember, marriage is a marathon and not a sprint.

Until I write to you again, grace and peace abound with you.